read with caution (mind the (sometimes invisible) brackets please).

i always come back from a dinner with her, feeling fresh and inspired. I know I am at a crossroad here, and i do think that i am beginning to make sense of that fog in front me, slowly but progressively. I think I can't wait till I hear her mother speaking @ Crown Hall this coming Sunday. It's going to be such a blessing for the people who come, to receive her mother's teachings. I swear I'd never stop learning about these things. Things that will eventually, be the grip that hold the human race and Mother Earth together, as one. (side-tracking case 1: the other thing that she probably would not mention, is the idea of physical touch *quotes pilates teacher @ Laban*).

My beliefs have always been with me. In an ideal world, they contribute by consciously making their appearance when choices are needed to be made. Yet sometimes, it is more often the case that a(n) (un)knowned force would drag me down that evil track, drugging down my beliefs, making them weak, and in the worst case scenario, would lead to an ultimate addiction and dependency towards IT. It, the very it we are speaking of here, is no other than the power of BIG, the power of POWER (shit i side-tracked again~!)

Ok, I must say that in the real world, in Darwin's world, 'power' has never failed to make itself important. With hierarchy, there comes power. okok, I have no silly intention to draw anyone into a series of discussion regarding 'power', and no i know nothing about it. Perhaps I just feel, and i like feeling about things more than about anything.

Maybe

that is why, I write badly.

My comments are mainly: wordy, wordy, wordy.

It is both good and bad to leave the academic world (forever or for a while, who knows).

Structuring an essay takes time, but it's better for communication purposes.

and

it's good in preventing side-tracking too. (KEHEM)

ANYWAY where were we.................

right. my beliefs and the power of media giants.

ok bad influences from advertising and those dramatic moments that will never happen to us.

I definitely, stand up for my beliefs, more than ever before, right this moment (as who knows what will i be thinking when i wake up tmr morning?). My intuitive attitude of following my feelings (yes, i must totally express my gratitude towards my parents, and the past-life-self that did wonders in order for me to have such freedom this day to do what I want to do) is telling me something important. I must obey my thoughts (and must not sidetrack when distractions come forth, as distractions are meant to be there, just because it is in their nature to distract you DUUH). I know I could learn more, if I choose to go this way.

It is not yet the time to give. I must admit that in the standards of the eastern social norm, I have achieve a point where I have no choice but to get a job asap so i stop spending time and money on things that is not financially beneficial blablabla. but for me, it is not the right time, just yet.

There is suddenly so much to process that I must actually sit down and structure my thoughts and write down to-do list, something I haven't done for a long time now. It seems now there are so many more things that I want to learn about. I dont feel I am tiny maybe because I am genuinely happy about what I am starting to choose to do. It's maybe what one would call passion?

So maybe this is it. or These are them. urgh. (seriously, I is hating, the royal rules of the Grammar.) hmm, dont think i will stop writing in crappy english though, unless one day the Queen decides that it's against the law or something.

that's about all of my inpiring thoughts of the day. too bad if you are finding myself boring and uninteresting (these two words are no way synonyms ok). i hope i will get myself bloggin more now, it's so helpful.